Grief in winter: Permission to breathe, rest and allow for what is
During winter, many of us mark the start of the new calendar year. The new year is often seen as a time to start over, or to become the best version of ourselves. Thoughts about the future year may be invigorating for some, but for those who are grieving, it may feel overwhelming to consider the reality of a future without your person being present.
In nature, winter is a season of stillness – with hard earth, bare trees and snow-covered ground. It is marked by less sunlight, long nights, freezing temperatures and muted landscape. The winter elements make it understandable to feel heavy, turn inward, and have lower energy. However, these feelings may still seem in direct conflict with society’s emphasis on the need to plan for the year ahead. It’s okay to let go of the pressure of what is expected and instead allow yourself to have space to be in the stillness of the season.
Now may be the time to take your cues from the season and see this as a natural period for rest. Winter can offer us the opportunity to move slowly, listen and notice where we are in our grief and what we may need right now to make it through the next few months. We invite you to give your grief the space it requires in this moment.
If you are feeling compelled to slow down and tune into your needs, here are some gentle ways to tend to your grief during the winter season.
Step outside
If going for a walk feels unmanageable, try simply standing or sitting outdoors for a few minutes. Even five minutes a day will allow you to breathe fresh air, hear or see the winter animals live their lives, and feel sunshine on your skin. This time can help to offer a sense of connection to the world around you, even if you do not feel fully ready to be a part of it.
Ground yourself
When life feels unsettled, grounding practices can help restore stability during colder days. For some, it may be taking time to focus on your breath, writing, repeating a mantra, or gentle movement such as yoga. There are many different ways to help yourself feel grounded. These moments create a calm space you can return to when things feel overwhelming.
Allow yourself softness
Winter is often seen as a hard season and when you are grieving, it can feel even harsher. Surrounding yourself with things that bring you comfort and make you feel cozy can help to soften the pressure of outside expectations. Whether it is embracing wearing comfortable clothes whenever needed, using more blankets, having soft candle light, or eating comforting food, creating an environment that embodies softness can ease pressure and give you permission to simply be.
Grief and winter are both times for us to nourish ourselves, both physically and mentally so that we feel more ready for the next season and the next part of our healing. However you find yourself in this season, may you find space to rest when you need rest, be with what is, without the pressure to change it.
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